Mark Twain
“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
“It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.”
“We have the best government that money can buy.”
“I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.”
“If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re misinformed.”
“There are lies, damned lies, and statistics.”
“Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.”
“If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”
“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.”
“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts.”
“Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing wrong with this, except that it ain’t so.”
“Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.”
“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).”
“Never have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.”
“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.”
“There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded.”
“The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not.”
“There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist, except an old optimist.”
“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”
“Laws control the lesser man… Right conduct controls the greater one.”
“A lie can travel half-way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.”
“Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.”
“Nothing so needs reforming as other people’s habits.”
“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
“Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.”
“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear — not absence of fear.”
“Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.”
“Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.”
“A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.”
“Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.”
“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”
“A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.”
“Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.”
“Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain.”
“Necessity is the mother of taking chances.”

Abraham Lincoln
And in the end it is not the years in your life that count, it’s the life in your years.”
“Adhere to your purpose and you will soon feel as well as you ever did. On the contrary, if you falter, and give up, you will lose the power of keeping any resolution, and will regret it all your life.”
“I do the very best I know how – the very best I can; and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.”
“You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.”
“I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts.”
“You have to do your own growing no matter how tall your grandfather was.”
“How many legs does a dog have if you call his tail a leg? Four. Saying that a tail is a leg doesn’t make it a leg.”
“We the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution.”
“We here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain – that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom – and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.”
“It is rather for us here dedicated to the great task remaining before us, that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion.”
“With Malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the right, as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in, to bind up the nation’s wounds.”
“As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy.”
“Stand with anybody that stands right, stand with him while he is right and part with him when he goes wrong.”
“It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.”
“The ballot is stronger than the bullet.”
“Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.”

John F. Kennedy
“Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country,”
“Tolerance implies no lack of commitment to one’s own beliefs. Rather it condemns the oppression or persecution of others.”
“There are risks and costs to action. But they are far less than the long-range risks of comfortable inaction.”
“Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of liberty.”
“Victory has a thousand fathers, but defeat is an orphan.”
“Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate.”
“I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered at the White House – with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone.”
“For time and the world do not stand still. Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or the present are certain to miss the future.”
“Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.”

Theodore Roosevelt
“I care not what others think of what I do, but I care very much about what I think of what I do! That is character!”
“To announce that there must be no criticism of the president… is morally treasonable to the American public.”
“It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.”
“It behooves every man to remember that the work of the critic is of altogether secondary importance, and that, in the end, progress is accomplished by the man who does things.”
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”

Franklin D. Roosevelt
“A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk forward.”
“The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have little.”
“Democracy cannot succeed unless those who express their choice are prepared to choose wisely. The real safeguard of democracy, therefore, is education.”
“It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.”“
I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm.”

Winston Churchill
“It has been said that Democracy is the worst form of government except all those other forms that have been tried from time to time.”
“The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”
“A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject.”
“The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”
“I’m prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.”
“You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something in your life.”
“If you are going through hell, keep going.”
“Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.”
“Yes, I am drunk. And you, Bessie, are ugly. But I shall be sober in the morning, and you will still be ugly.“
“Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few.”
“Without courage, all other virtues lose their meaning.”
“We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.”
“There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world, and the worst of it is that half of them are true.”
“It is no use saying ‘we are doing our best.’ You have got to succeed in doing what is necessary.”
“This is the lesson: never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never – in nothing, great or small, large or petty – never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy.”
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue that counts.”
“Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.”

Thomas Edison
“Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.”
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”
“The three great essentials to achieve anything worthwhile are, first, hard work; second, stick-to-itiveness; third, common sense.”
“If we all did the things we are really capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.”
“When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this – you haven’t.”

Ben Franklin
“Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.”
“They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.”
“It takes many good deeds to build a good reputation, and only one bad one to lose it.”
“Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.”
“You may delay, but time will not.”
“In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.”
“We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.”
“By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.”
“An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.”
“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.”
“It is the first responsibility of every citizen to question authority.”
“Instead of cursing the darkness, light a candle.”

Thomas Jefferson
“Enlighten the people generally, and tyranny and oppressions of body and mind will vanish like evil spirits at the dawn of day.”
“Where the press is free and every man able to read, all is safe.”
“Whenever the people are well-informed, they can be trusted with their own government.”
“The care of human life and happiness, and not their destruction, is the first and only object of good government.”
“He who knows nothing is closer to the truth than he whose mind is filled with falsehoods and errors.”
“The moment a person forms a theory, his imagination sees in every object only the traits which favor that theory.”
“All, too, will bear in mind this sacred principle, that though the will of the majority is in all cases to prevail, that will to be rightful must be reasonable; that the minority possess their equal rights, which equal law must protect, and to violate would be oppression.”

William Shakespeare
“To be, or not to be: that is the question.”
“All the world‘s a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts.”
“‘Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”
“The better part of valor is discretion.”
“Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.”
“Cowards die many times before their deaths; the valiant never taste of death but once.”
“To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.”
“All that glisters is not gold.”
“‘Nothing will come of nothing.”
“Cry ‘havoc!’ and let slip the dogs of war.”
“There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”
“The fault, dear Brutus, lies not within the stars, but in ourselves, that we are underlings.”
“The evil that men do lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones.”
“‘Brevity is the soul of wit.”
“If we are marked to die, we are enough to do our country loss; and if to live, the fewer men, the greater share of honor.”
“What’s done can’t be undone.”
“The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.”
“Nothing in his life became him like the leaving it.”

Oscar Wilde
“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
“There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.”
“Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.”
“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”
“I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.” – Oscar Wilde
“The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.”
“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”
“I don’t want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there.”
“Experience is merely the name men gave to their mistakes.”
“Everything in moderation, including moderation.”
“What is a cynic? A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.”
“When the gods wish to punish us they answer our prayers.”

Sun Tzu (from The Art of War)
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”
“All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must seem inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near.”
“The general who advances without coveting fame and retreats without fearing disgrace, whose only thought is to protect his country and do good service for his sovereign, is the jewel of the kingdom.”
“So in war, the way is to avoid what is strong and to strike at what is weak.”

“To see victory only when it is within the ken of the common herd is not the acme of excellence.””The art of war is of vital importance to the state. It is a matter of life and death, a road either to safety or to ruin. Hence it is a subject of inquiry which can on no account be neglected.”
“He will win who knows when to fight and when not to fight.”
“The general who wins the battle makes many calculations in his temple before the battle is fought. The general who loses makes but few calculations beforehand.”
“Thus it is that in war the victorious strategist only seeks battle after the victory has been won, whereas he who is destined to defeat first fights and afterwards looks for victory.”
“Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win.”
“For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill.”
“The good fighters of old first put themselves beyond the possibility of defeat, and then waited for an opportunity of defeating the enemy.”

Yogi Berra
“When you come to a fork in the road…. take it.”
“It ain’t over till it’s over.”
“The future ain’t what it used to be.”
“It’s like déjà vu all over again.”
“No one goes there nowadays, it’s too crowded.”
“Ninety percent of the game is half mental.”
“I usually take a two-hour nap from 1 to 4.”
“He hits from both sides of the plate. He’s amphibious.”
“A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.”
“I always thought the record would stand until it was broken.”
“You can observe a lot by just watching.”
“We made too many wrong mistakes.”
“Pair up in threes.”
“Never answer an anonymous letter.”
“Even Napoleon had his Watergate.”
“Why buy good luggage? You only use it when you travel.”
“I don’t know (if they were men or women fans running naked across the field). They had bags over their heads.”
“It gets late early out here.”
“Take it with a grin of salt.”
“In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.”
“You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.”
“If the world was perfect, it wouldn’t be.”
“You don’t have to swing hard to hit a home run. If you got the timing, it’ll go.”
“I never said most of the things I said.”

Vince Lombardi
“Winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing.”
“It’s not whether you get knocked down, it’s whether you get up.”
“Winners never quit and quitters never win.”

Standalone Quotes
“I belong to no organized party. I am a Democrat.” – Will Rogers
“Don’t cry because it’s over; smile because it happened. – Dr. Seuss (attribution not clear, though.)
“Some men see things as they are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were, and ask why not.” – Robert Kennedy
“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” – Edmund Burke
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, wild turkey in one hand, cigarette in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming “Whoo-hoo …what a ride!” – (As seen in a bar in Cairns, Australia but very similar to a quote attributed to Hunter S. Thompson.)
“When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” – Joseph P. Kennedy
“I can’t understand why a person will take a year or two to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.” – Fred Allen
“If you don’t go to other men’s funerals, they won’t go to yours.” – Clarence Day
“A man with outward courage dares to die; a man with inner courage dares to live.” – Tao Te Ching (aka Lao Tzu).
“Don’t give up; don’t ever give up!” – Jim Valvano
“My favorite things in life don’t cost any money. It’s really clear that the most precious resource we all have is time.” – Steve Jobs
“… all human wisdom is summed up in these two words – ‘Wait and hope.’” – The Count of Monte Cristo
“If you live to the age of a hundred, you have it made because very few people die past the age of a hundred.” – George Burns
“Say what you will about the ten commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.” – H. L. Mencken
“I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.” – Groucho Marx
“I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.” – Groucho Marx
“Faced with the choice between changing one’s mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everybody gets busy on the proof.” – J. K. Galbraith’s Law of Human Nature
“Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong.” – John Diefenbaker
“Furious activity is no substitute for understanding.” – H. H. Williams
“Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.” – Elbert Hubbard
“Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.” – Milton Friedman
“Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.” – W. C. Fields
“I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forego their use.” – Galileo Galilei
“I have discovered the art of deceiving diplomats. I tell them the truth and they never believe me.” – Camillo Di Cavour
“I hate it when my foot falls asleep during the day cause that means it’s going to be up all night.” – Steven Wright
“I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.” – Blaise Pascal
“I like to believe that people in the long run are going to do more to promote peace than our governments. Indeed, I think that people want peace so much that one of these days governments had better get out of the way and let them have it.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower
“I only know that I do not know, but that is something after all.” – ejb
“If I have seen farther than others, it is because I was standing on the shoulders of giants.” – Isaac Newton
“If you live in a country run by committee, be on the committee.” – Graham Summer
“If your parents didn’t have sex, the odds are that you won’t either.” – Kazayasu Makabe
“If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.” – Derek Bok
“If you think the problem is bad now, just wait until we’ve solved it.” – Arthur Kasspe
“Ignorance is never out of style. It was in fashion yesterday, it is the rage today, and it will set the pace tomorrow.” – Franklin K. Dane
“Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality. – Jules de Gaultier
“i’m living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.” – e. e. cummings
“I’m proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is I could be just as proud for half the money.” – Arthur Godfrey
“In America, any boy may become president and I suppose that’s just one of the risks he takes.” – Adlai Stevenson
“Isn’t it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists?” – Kelvin Throop III
“In an organization, each person rises to the level of his own incompetency.” – The Peter Principle
“I wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then.” – Bob Seger
“And don’t criticize what you can’t understand.” – Bob Dylan
“And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?” – Roger Waters
“I’d rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints, sinners are much more fun.” – Billy Joel
“Don’t it always seem to go, that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.” – Joni Mitchell

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